Thursday, May 29, 2014

Being Ginger, Fairy Dust Cookies & Matters of Such Importance

It's been awhile. I still have a pulse. So do they.  I told the mom yesterday, "Feel free to check the hidden cameras for verification that I'm not harming Lil Sis."  
It's been 4 weeks since our courtship began.  Four long weeks of this:

"This nanny is not what I ordered!"
And this:

"Where's my Grandma? My Momma? Anybody but the woman in glasses."

During meltdowns (mine not hers), I've actually pleaded with The Cousin as to why this is happening? "What am I doing wrong?" I pathetically ask the 3-year old. 
"She's just not used to you yet, Valerie." She replies matter-a-factly.

Well, that's bullshit! Kids love me! I wanna scream these words at the top of my amateurish nanny lungs and yet, I regroup in a mindful, yoga type pattern of breathing. 

"I'm not Cinderella. I'm the Fairy Godmother."
Thank God I have a Fairy Godmother! I'm on the verge of asking her to do some "bippity boppity boo" and make Lil Sis turn into a pumpkin.
She wore this outfit yesterday and proceeded to make me "fairy dust cookies." 
They were absolutely delicious! I tell her so. I tell her she can be anything she wants; an artist, a chef, a mechanic, an architect. She tells me she wants to "go on expeditions with Chrissy." 
(Christopher Robbins) This guy is her current favorite and I can see why. He's smart, kind, 
well-read, curious and adventurous. The Cousin and I have these discussions when Lil Sis is snoozing. They are now routinely interrupted when the vocal and independent "ginger" is awake.  
Whew! All fire, man!  If it wasn't me attempting to tame the flame, I'd find her quite charming I'm sure.

One week, Lil Sis slept for 3 hours.  (Nanny Confession: I didn't check to see if she was still breathing.)
Can one say, "Paradise?" It's paradise when she naps.  Let's just be honest. 
It's the fucking Garden of Eden. 
It's true, The Cousin and I are having to adjust. You see, pre-Lil Sis, she and I had lots of time to explore, create, discuss matters of such importance, get into trouble.  That's all changed slightly.
And, she's a bit irritated about the change and the whole "attention thing."  Can you blame her?

"Let's give her privacy. Just put her in the other room and close the door."

I can see where The Cousin is coming from. 
The Cousin and I have a lot in common, as I've had the same thoughts. 

When I was in my junior college years, I studied child development and then went on to get my teaching credential. I was a pompous, 'know-it-all' when it came to children and other important matters and I swore, (even wrote papers about it) that I would never plop my child or any other person's child in front of a television, video, etc.  I spewed the research to anyone who would listen about "the evils and harm" of those types of distractions.

Let's just say things have changed.

"Valerie, I'll be done in a minute." 
"Go ahead and stay 5 more minutes." Hell, stay as long as you like.

I say this in order to get Lil Sis' diaper changed. I say this to give me time to feed Lil Sis. I say this because I have learned to carry Lil Sis in a pack on my chest while I do dishes and clean up the house. 
I say this because I'm not very good at doing all of the above and, simultaneously, engaging in conversations with a 3-year old.  
Lil Sis is a challenge, but there are others in this household...

Challenge # 104 for the nanny.

Challenge #105
This house is a diabetic wet dream.  
Each Wednesday, amidst the shitty diapers and screams of discontent, I fight off binging.  I can see why stay-at-home-parents do it. I can see why they down a box of Wheat Thins or a bag of Milano cookies, while listening to Ellen and looking at their Iphones.  Do I condone it? Hell no! Do I have a great understanding and appreciation for it now, hell yes! 

Folks, it is getting better. The Cousin loves to bake and a couple Wednesdays ago, we made her mom a Mother's Day cake.  (Let me be clear, though tempting, I did not partake in the bottles of red liquid behind the mixing bowl.)

"I don't crack eggs, Valerie."

"But I do shake, shake, shake the sprinkles."

"Happy Mother's Day, Momma!"
Yesterday, we met Sweet Pea and her mom at the park.  
Carrying a baby in one of those chest/back contraptions isn't easy, but I forged ahead because Sweet Pea's mom is young, energetic, in shape and I fully intended to take advantage of her being there.

First, I practiced...

"The bags under my eyes are well-earned."
Then, the real deal...

"This is gonna be interesting."
Caledonia Park, Pacific Grove, CA...

Sweet Pea aka "I can do it myself."

We made it home before the "tireds" set in, and in all honesty, it was a pretty good day.

Let's call it a "half bottle of red" rather than a "full bottle of red" kinda day. 
However, a question, to all you parentals out there, continues to loop through my brain-feed, 
"After having one, why in the hell would you have another?!"

Thanks for reading, y'all!

"I'll ease up when I feel she gains an understanding of who's really in charge."