Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Take a Glance

Here’s What’s Makin Today’s Headlines, People!
*US Needs Pakistan To Fight With Us At Afghanistan -Pakistan Border. (In an effort to make buddies with them, and with the help of yours and my tax bucks, we are building schools, hospitals and roads in Pakistan. Hmm..How 'bout New Orleans getting some of that stuff?
*The Terminator Declares “Cali” A Fiscal Emergency. Duh.
*Obama Agrees To Extend Bush Tax Cuts To All Americans Including Wealthy (Breaking Campaign Promise # 38 & done in “secret” meetings with “Repubs” behind closed doors.) LIAR!
*The Town of Salinas has a Bucket List: Things To Do In Salinas Before You Die.
*Palin Kills a Moose
*Gay Wedding on Skype Declared Invalid
And my personal favorite…
*Macy's Santa Fired for Telling a Naughty Joke
According to SF Weekly...
John Toomey, a beloved Macy's Santa for more than 20 years, has been sacked. His crime: An off-color joke for an "elderly" couple who saw fit to sit on Santa's knee. When grown-ups sit on his knee, Toomey said, he asks them if they've been good. When they say, "Yes," he replies, "That's too bad." He then notes that Santa is jolly because "I know where all the naughty boys and girls live."
While the Santa says he's been telling this joke for decades, this time he found an unreceptive audience. The couple complained and, as of Saturday, Toomey is out on his ass. Macy's has refused discussion with the media, but Santa's co-workers are distraught, although not yet ready to picket. But the 68-year-old Toomey said, "When God closes a door, he opens a window."
More like a chimney. One of my all time favorite quotes regarding the headlines is this…
“I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what's moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who probably read the news themselves.”
Any guesses as to whose lips uttered such wisdom? Good guess, but NO they don’t live in the trailer park. But actually “Georgie” would fit in quite nicely here!

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