Thursday, February 28, 2013

The New Normal

I had only been in the house 2 minutes, when I saw these. 

Man. I couldn't stop thinking about them.  Couldn't take my eyes off of them.  But I held my ground; stayed strong for over 3 hours and then I broke down like an old, beater car.

The Cousin's kitchen is filled with sugar crap: chocolate chip cup cakes, Girl Scout cookies, real cream ice cream.   It's like The Big Rock Candy Mountain and I'm always having to host these little conversations in my head: "Don't eat it. You're a diabetic." 
"Just eat half." "You can run instead of walk today."  God knows what's in these things, but the ingredients register high on the "delish meter."  They're to die for.  When I finally broke, I cut one into small pieces, as if that would reduce the fat and calorie content, but damn!
I wish I could tell y'all that this was my one and only challenge yesterday.
But the truth is, there were many and I don't mean of the 'small-bump-in-the-road' caliber.
It was a war zone.  I'm talkin full-on 20-ft ditches that left the three of us with battle scars.
But these bumps; these battles are quite frankly, my new normal.

Sweet Pea took a lot of "hits" in the morning; Sweet Pea who thinks she's 7 years old
not 10 months.
To begin with, she climbed up onto a plastic chair and came crashing down like Humpty Dumpty, biting her lip and hitting her nose on the way to the floor.  Shit!
This was the first time there'd been blood on my watch.

Then, as if she hadn't experienced enough trauma to her face, The Cousin went after her with a
"pinch-grip" that left a red, 1-inch line on her left cheek.  That was prior to The Cousin placing another choke-hold and leaving marks on the back of her little neck.
It all happens so quickly, folks. Let me tell you. I'm not in the kitchen eating cookies when the war breaks out. I'm right there, 2-3 feet away from the soldiers, and I still can't stop it!
I think I have to get more firm with The Cousin. But look at this face.

As I said, Sweet Pea definitely took her share of hits.  But the cool thing about Sweet Pea is...
She's Sweet Pea.  She's like a fucking Rolex. She just keeps on ticking.

I resorted to Cheerios as a sort of peace-offering. It actually helped, at least temporarily; like a band-aid on a deep wound.  It stopped the bleeding for the time being.

Then Sweet Pea took matters (and the jar of cereal) into her own hands.

She's a "dumper."
She grabs shit and dumps it faster than lightening.  Here she's finding total pleasure in dumping the water from her tipee cup and then playing in it.



The afternoon got better. It got better because of a little 3-letter word called "N A P."
And I felt as if I accomplished the most challenging feat known to man and womankind: 
I got them to both nap at the same time. 
Okay. I'm so lucky right now.

And then, I walked and walked until I ended up here.

And no, I didn't pull a "Thelma and Louise" and send the little sweeties over the cliff at high speed. 
But rather, I sat on a nearby bench, soaked up the sun, breathed in the salty, ocean air and realized how lucky I am to live in a place like this. 
I'm sure, now that you've seen this picture, any slight amount of pity you might have had for me and my nanny plight, is probably long gone. 
Yep. It's not a bad place to work.
My quiet moment did however come to an end, as all good things often do.
We ended up at the park and all of us, including Kitty, had a great time!



  1. GREAT pictures! Those two monkeys are lucky to have you!

  2. Life in the trenches, indeed, when you're the nanny and all hell breaks loose! Handled it well, though....Cheerios worked their magic! Love Sweet Pea's big smile and laughing eyes. And the serious intensity of The Cousin who has to deal with her little squirmy relative who gets into her stuff! But the view while the two were napping? Breathtaking! Restores one's senses, even if for just a little while. And it looked like "all's well that ends well." Hope it carries over to next week. Till then.....